r/RedditForGrownups:

u/TheBodyPolitic1

If you go and try, you will get better at it.
u/TheBodyPolitic1

Your parents are fucked up. They abused you. You were an abused child. Do yourself a favor and try to get therapy.
u/TheBodyPolitic1

The college prep you do now will effect you for the rest of your life. Bravo for being proactive! The only questions I have would be scheduling, if you got done what you needed to get done on time. A few years ago I read a great self help by Dr. Neal Fiore based on his research. Bottom line: the most successful people are the “work hard, play hard” people. Workaholics get the least done and done well. So, it is good to hear that you plan on making time to enjoy life while do your college prep. Reddit isn’t a great place for reliable information. Also, don’t be concerned about the downvotes. Some people downvote out of emotional reactions. Your long post about your schedule probably “triggered” them about their busy lives. Instead of thinking about what you needed to hear they probably downvoted out of emotion and then moved on. If you want someone who might know something perhaps you can review it with high school guidance counselors, academic advisors from the colleges you are interested in, and instructors from SAT/college exam prep courses. Good Luck.
u/TheBodyPolitic1

I would love for /u/Known-Damage-7879 to post an update after that!
u/TheBodyPolitic1

Like, ignore requests from people who are dying? Everyone makes mistakes, but they arent coming back when they are gone. First, I am not talking about your story. Second, I suggested to the OP that she hear her old estranged coworker out. If he speaks maga shit, to give him a chance by telling him she doesn’t care for it and seeing where he goes from there.
u/TheBodyPolitic1

The best way to deal with passive aggressive people is to be upfront, honest, polite, and loud and clear. You should have said to her something like “Excuse me. Do you have a problem with me? Because you are jabbing at me all of the time and not in friendly way”. If that behavior doesn’t stop, you reply back to it 2-3 more times. Then you have a band meeting to discuss the problem. Then you leave the band letting them know why. It is still not to late for them to know. Especially since she is dumping on you for leaving the band. So called friends roasting on each other is most common among adolescent boys. Adults who continue that practice tend to be emotionally inept adults. They are incapable of expressing friendship or being friends without using insults. I had a job on a break from college working in the loading dock of a big department store. This kind of adolescent behavior happened all of the time. I greyrocked it all until one day I got tired of it and returned in kind. The guy who I insulted back got pissed, jumped on me, and others had to pull him off. Don’t believe the BS “it is all in fun!”. Stand up for yourself when it happens. Let people know it isn’t appreciated. If that doesn’t fix it move on to a new crowd of people.
u/TheBodyPolitic1

A nurse practitioner decided, without talking to me, that I was overweight from overeating. Many medical professionals will not have such conversations even when lifestyle changes could replace medication, because people get offended and hostile. Sometimes they even sue doctors for telling them that they are sick because they are overweight. Go back to the dietitian who successfully advised you toward achieving your 20 lb weight loss. If you have to use this nurse practitioner explain to her what you explained to us. If you do not have to use this nurse practitioner just switch to a new professional. The note was likely a medical judgement, not a personal one about your character. You will only look bad for bringing it up outside of the context of solving a medical problem.
u/TheBodyPolitic1

I’ve sought professional help and it only changed so much. Research has shown that equally educated and experienced therapists may succeed with a particular patient where others have failed. Who the therapist and patient are as people matters. It may be worth it to try therapy again, possibly accompanied by medication.
u/TheBodyPolitic1

/u/Card_Belcher_Poster has 27 comments in /r/Teenager_Polls.
u/TheBodyPolitic1

/u/Comfortable_Pack8903 Does the original thread for this update still exist? Link? Why is this person contacting you out of all of his coworkers and family? Do you think he had unrealized romantic/sexual desires for you? I was taught that often dying people are open to frank conversations. If you decide to contact him don’t bring anything unpleasant up unless he goes into trump-mode. Sometimes for a dying person it is just a wonderful thing to be distracted from themselves. If he does go into trump-mode tell you always had a problem with him over some things, and then tell him what you told us. Contact him again after that to see if he decided to let go of the trumpshit. What do you get out of it? Helping someone who is dying to feel more emotionally comfortable, even temporarily is a wonderful thing. It will make you feel good knowing you did it.