r/relationship_advice:

u/zengeezer

I think she should be entitled to retain any videos that she is in.
u/zengeezer

It’s totally up to you what’s out of bounds for you. If you feel his behavior is cheating then you get to treat it like cheating. But I have to say, REAL cheating is another thing. Knowing that your partner has been having sex with someone else can be a hard thing to bear. So there’s that.
u/zengeezer

This is a complex situation. Both your girlfriend and your other friend have a lot of influence on the situation. Whether they want to or not. And whether you want them to or not. The most drastic way to resolve this is to stop seeing your other friend. Your girlfriend will have to abandon her jealousy. OR – your girlfriend might have to grow up a little. What’s wrong with loving more than one friend? As long as you’re not having a physical relationship with your friend, your girlfriend really has nothing to complain about. Women keep telling me that a loving and caring man is what they are looking for. I know that’s not really true, but loving and caring are real big in the over-60 demographic.
u/zengeezer

Your boyfriend is not normal. He needs counseling. Or maybe incarceration.
u/zengeezer

I think she’s being extreme for distrusting you about this. There are far worse things to hide, and I think she is overreacting. Maybe there’s something else she doesn’t like about you, and maybe she’s using this as an excuse to alienate you.
u/zengeezer

You don’t have to put up with that crap, and I totally understand why you have lost attraction for him. He deserves to be told about this. He might start to take it seriously. Or not.
u/zengeezer

I think it is wrong for him to threaten to cut off contact with you over this. From your description, it sounds like you are very well off financially. Your son probably grew up in that privileged environment, and maybe that’s why he thinks everything should be given to him. Your son is behaving like a brat, but you could also share your wealth with him. Maybe he will take care of you when he becomes a doctor.
u/zengeezer

It sounds like it was just an offhand remark related to the movie you were watching. If you suffer from body dysmorphia then maybe that was the wrong movie for you to be watching together.
u/zengeezer

I have some friends of low character. Sometimes I think I’m the only normal person they have contact with. I think maybe their lives are not your business.
u/zengeezer

It’s never easy when you have to turn your back on a family member. I and my siblings had to do it. You get to reevaluate, periodically, whether ignoring your parents is a benefit to you or not. You can always change what you’re doing.