r/dating:

u/zengeezer

Certainly. But this kind of thing will continue to happen until you separate your present behavior from your past. If you can’t do that right now then you should wait before dating. As long as you are actively suffering from the pain of those experiences you are subjecting the guys you date to the pain of those experiences as well. And maybe there’s a positive aspect to this experience for you. Sometimes painful experiences force us to see things about ourselves that we might not have seen otherwise.
u/zengeezer

Maybe that would work as a conversation rather than a manifesto. Consider interacting with him rather than dumping on him. Consider (just for a moment) his feelings. I would file this under things-not-to-do-again.
u/zengeezer

I gave up on casual sex years ago because nobody wants it. I’ve given up on dating for periods of time, but I’ve always resumed. I’ve had some good dates but no sex.
u/zengeezer

You sent him a long message listing everything you thought was wrong, and you didn’t anticipate how he would receive it? Keep doing the therapy.
u/zengeezer

I think her answer was “no”.
u/zengeezer

You’ve been dating for 6 weeks and you call him a boyfriend? Being averaged looking isn’t bad. Some of us would love to hear that.
u/zengeezer

The only way I know is to take him for a test drive.
u/zengeezer

You might as well tell him. There are special dating sites set up for MAGAs, incels, mama’s boys, gun nuts, and other undesirables.
u/zengeezer

I’ve done it, and I’ve never had a problem with it. The sex is a little tricky.
u/zengeezer

Maybe she likes dating you. Maybe she doesn’t have an agenda. Enjoy it while it lasts.