r/dating:

u/zengeezer

You didn’t do anything wrong by leaving. It wasn’t such a good idea to go to his place on a first date, but you are in charge of the chances you take. I’m surprised you got out of there without being molested.
u/zengeezer

I met one at a Laundromat. A couple of them were at bars. One at a house party. A couple through singles club events. One through a personal ad in the newspaper. But that was all in the last century. No partners yet in this century. Come to think of it, I haven’t met any women through dating apps who are even interested in fooling around.
u/zengeezer

I have some additional perspective for you. It’s possible that men who stare at you are afraid to approach you. Many of us men have lived a life of rejection and just aren’t ready for more. You know, you can be stung by bees repeatedly and at some point a bee sting becomes deadly.
u/zengeezer

I’d call myself an enhanced 50/50 dater. My goal is to split everything down the middle, but that doesn’t always make sense. For example: there might be a big difference in the cost of restaurant dinner between me and a woman. And I’ve had an unfair income advantage over women all my life. Anyway, when dating in your 70s you find that not all women are enlightened. I’ve dated women who become upset with the idea that I should pay for dinner, and I’ve dated women who become upset that I shouldn’t. I’m prepared to handle the expenses of dating any way it comes up.
u/zengeezer

That’s the right attitude!
u/zengeezer

Time and suffering. I exerted mental energy to avoid thinking about her. It felt like lifting weights at the gym. But after about 6 months, I was alive again. When I allow myself to remember that episode of my life I congratulate myself for surviving.
u/zengeezer

You’re going to have to overcome that homeschooling. It’s going to be difficult to make up for the loss of several years of social interaction in high school. Those are critical years. For now, I suggest you try not to focus on your goal of finding a girlfriend, but instead get used to spending time with women. Learn to be comfortable, learn to be confident. You can use the dating apps to simply interact with women. Work on getting them to answer you. Work on your approach, work on the way you present yourself. Be honest, be yourself. You don’t have to tell them that you are shy or unsophisticated.
u/zengeezer

I do. I’m a white guy, and I’ve dated several black women. I even had a multi-year relationship with one. I don’t know about other white guys. I’m sure a lot of them are intimidated. Also, the standard of beauty for Black women is a little different – Black women tend to be thick. I’m not into thick.
u/zengeezer

I was married for 13 years to a woman who didn’t like sex. DUMP HER! Life is too short to suffer that way.
u/zengeezer

I think the question “why are you single” is just a popular thing right now. You aren’t required to have an answer, but it is an interesting question to ponder on your own. I have several answers. Relationships require time and effort, and I haven’t found a woman who merits all that time and effort. I haven’t met a woman with whom I share a romantic interest. I’m just not as desperate for a relationship as I was when I was younger.